Sunday, March 30, 2008

Do you suffer from LNTS?

I'm totally making this up, but if there could be a medical diagnosis of what I struggle with a lot, I think it would be called "Late Night Thinker Syndrome." I am often like a drone during the day, moving about from place to place, mindlessly doing my business. Class is a good example of my daily behavior. I wake up at 8:02 (give or take a few minutes) every morning, take a shower, jump on my bike, and head off to class. In class, I sit there and take notes, and then repeat that three more times before heading to lunch, then my bike, and finally arriving back home. I seldom have deep thoughts about life in the context of my daily routine, but as soon as the sun sets, my LNTS starts kicking in. My mind begins to wander from topic to topic (often sparked by the events of that day), and I plough through the various scenarios being created in my head. Who would think that such a strange looking organ as the brain could contain so much knowledge in the incredible way God has designed it? And it is not this thinking that is the problem, but thinking is a cause of the problem. I suppose being human, or maybe just pessimistic at times, I often make the worst-case scenarios of the things I think about. Even though all of this goes on inside the walls of my head, it is incredible how much effect thinking can have on a tired mind and body. 
The main problem is my worrying. I find that I worry about my future more than anything, given that is the one area of time and experience that my mind does not know or remember. The future is a big question mark, and all I can do is entertain thoughts of what could be or should be. I know that we are supposed to keep an eternal perspective on this earth, but eternity does not mean this life on earth. I tend to equate eternity with time, but on the contrary, eternity in its truest form has nothing to do with time. Time is a human way of trying to describe a non-human concept. Eternity is outside of time just like God is outside of time, and it has much to do with God. Hebrews 12:2 says what I'm trying say much better: "Let us fix our eyes on Jesus, the author and perfecter of our faith, who for the joy set before Him endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down at the right hand of the throne of God." There are a few things I get from encouraging verse. First of all, we are supposed to fix our eyes on Jesus. This means that regardless of the chaos or uncertainty of a situation, we are called to put our eyes on One who is outside of time, just like eternity. This is what it means to have an eternal perspective. Secondly, He is the one who created and perfects our faith. What is faith? Moving a chapter back in Hebrews (1:1), the author defines it nicely saying, "Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see." With that in mind, I have to ask myself, "Am I having faith late at night when I exaggeratedly worry about what I hope for and remain uncertain of what I do not see?" NO! I am not practicing faith at all late at night, allowing my mind to rule me rather than vice versa. If Christ is the author of our faith, He must know how to use it much better than we do, so we should learn from Him. Also, if He is the perfecter of our faith, we shouldn't be spending so much time trying to work out the problems ourselves. The key to Hebrews 12:2 is that Christ should be the center of our focus at all times, even late at night. I'm sure as a human He had lots of worries about the cross and the enormous task of bearing all of our sin upon Himself. However, He laid down His worries at His Father's feet, and He endured the cross, scorning its shame, and sat down by His Father's right hand, the place of highest honor. That is the role model of faith. John 17 is a great chapter if you want to take a closer look at what kind of faith Christ had in the Father.
So that I don't go on eternally (get it?), I will tie up my thoughts. I am human, and therefore prone to struggle with Late Night Thinking. However, that is just one of many areas I struggle with, and perhaps you do not struggle with that specific area as much as others, but the point is that humans fight sin. We all tend to worry, but living with our eyes focused on Jesus Christ is the best way to learn to leave our concerns at the feet of One who loves us deeply and also is willing and able to perfect our faith. That is the prescription for LNTS. We can trust God and know that at His right hand sits the One who paid the price and enable us to live free of worry. Of course we will struggle, fall, and ponder the foggy future, but know that a loving Lord is walking through it all with us. What a hope!
Wow, this was longer than I anticipated! I just got going, I guess. Well, it's getting late, and my mind is beginning to get tired. I'm a bit worried about that test tomorrow, so I better go to bed.

P.S. The second-best prescription for LNTS other than fixing your eyes on Christ is sleep! He gave that to us, too!

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